Nostalgia
by forbiddenist
Summary: “This is the line that marks insanity, Sasuke.” He made a line in the dirt in front of him with his foot. “Cross it.” ItaSasu, NaruSasu, slight GaaSasu. Rated M. Really. Now with Lemon.
1. Chapter 1

Title : Nostalgia.

Rating : NC 16

Summary: "This is the line that marks insanity, Sasuke."

He made a line in the dirt in front of him with his foot.

"Cross it."

Pairing : ItaSasu, NaruSasu, slight GaaSasu.

* * *

He leaned into the other's embrace, allowing himself just that little bit of release as he put his arms around that strong neck, as he allowed himself to be comforted by those brutal yet gentle hands.

"Sasuke."

He couldn't resist the lips that pressed against his own, couldn't keep himself from indulging in the sweet words that was whispered into his ear.

"Sasuke."

_Wake up_.

Obsidian eyes snapped open.

He did not allow himself to let out the whimper that had crept its way up his throat; instead sitting up and wiping the sweat off his forehead, tucking a few loose strands of hair behind his ears. His cheeks felt wet, his breathing was heavy, and his mind was clouded.

And the first thought that jumped into his head was Uzumaki Naruto.

* * *

Naruto stretched; right about to tuck himself into bed, he picked up an all too familiar chakra signature approaching his quarters.

He just sat there, waiting for that ever familiar silhouette to appear at his window.

_He came back three months ago. _

"_Uchiha Sasuke came back." _

_Everyone didn't believe it at first, even Naruto couldn't believe it. In fact, when Sasuke had shown up behind Naruto on his way back from a mission, Naruto had to pinch himself to ensure it was real. He touched the Uchiha's face, reliving every detail, and he pulled the now smaller boy into his arms, and he was so afraid to let go, he held the Uchiha in such a tight embrace it was almost as if the other would disappear if he did. _

"Yo, Sasuke." The other boy made no reply; he just sat against the window, hugging himself.

The blonde smiled and turned to face the ebony-haired boy, tilting his head a little, that familiar, _comforting _smile in place on his face.

"What brings you here so late?"

Sasuke's eyes were cold, his skin tinted blue in the dull lighting.

He looked almost dead.

Naruto sighed, getting off the bed nonchalantly; he made his slow progress towards the boy at the window, stopping but just a few centimeters away from him. He wasn't sure what Sasuke wanted, or what he NEEDED, but he did try his best to give it to him. After all, he'd already lost him once; he didn't want to lose him again. So Naruto tried his best to understand and study Sasuke's body language, the way he moved and reacted to certain things, they way he acted when he wanted or craved something.

Because Sasuke barely spoke anymore.

He held his arms out in front of the other boy, at both his sides, in a gentle offer of a hug.

Naruto almost choked as he felt Sasuke crash against him, desperately seeking contact. His head had connected so hard with Naruto's chin he almost bit his tongue off. It was an extremely brief gesture, for immediately Sasuke pulled away, as swiftly as he had come into Naruto's arms.

The ebony-haired shinobi did not bring his eyes to Naruto's face, but kept his gaze on the floor, the floor, as if he was watching something remotely fascinating there. He almost winced when he felt Naruto's calloused fingers on his cheek.

"Sasuke."

He felt a shiver run down the older boy's spine, and he tensed as well, fearing that he had done something Sasuke didn't like, and he removed his hand quickly, almost as if he had been caught touching his mother's favorite porcelain dish.

He almost didn't catch the frown on Sasuke's face, the frown that had almost never been there.

"Touch me." It wasn't a command, it was something more than that, it was a request, a sincere pleading nature evident in the Uchiha's trembling voice.

Naruto smiled, a soft smile, and slowly put his arms about the smaller form, pulling the now shorter young man into a tight embrace, and he felt he could die of joy when Sasuke did the same.

The now taller shinobi could not help but notice the slightness of Sasuke's frame, how thin he had gotten in the time they'd been apart, how much taller he himself had grown than the boy that used to be just that few inches ahead.

"Sasuke."

The boy broke away at the mention of his name, and with a glare, he made for the window, leaving a very stunned Naruto behind.

* * *

Sasuke stalked back home, his face almost completely devoid of emotion except for that barely noticeable frown on his flawless pale face. He stopped at his apartment window, and he saw himself in the jet black reflective surface of glass, a pale, skinny boy, who looked too much like a girl, a pale, skinny boy who looked so broken and pained.

And he saw...

...Itachi.

He glared at nothing in particular with a growl, shoving the glass panel open none too gently before slipping inside, to a cold, empty place, devoid of any other human being, devoid of Naruto. He immediately headed for the showers, suddenly feeling so dirty.

_He couldn't forget what happened at Sound. He couldn't forget, even though he begged Orochimaru to erase his memories; no, Orochimaru wanted him to REMEMBER, remember what he had done to him, he wanted to SCORCH it into Sasuke's consciousness, even his sub-consciousness, he wanted Sasuke to think about it constantly, to curse him, to HATE him._

_Sasuke was even starting to forget the very REASON he harbored that searing hate in the first place. _

He desperately scrubbed at his arms, his neck, his thighs, desperately trying to get whatever it was off himself. His skin burned under the warm water, his scratch marks not helping the situation much.

_They touched him. They touched him. They touched him._

_He could still feel their fingertips running over his skin. He had not consented, no; he didn't want any part of it. He felt so soiled, so broken, so used and discarded. He longed for someone to actually care, longed for someone to call his own, instead of being just 'owned'. He felt nauseous, he prayed to whatever god that would listen that someone would save him from this living hell._

He touched his cheek, suddenly remembering Naruto's lingering touch, that gentle contact, so different from what he had been conditioned to endure in Sound.

He was silently grateful, grateful for the forgiving people of Konoha, grateful for the things he'd learned from the people around him, grateful for Naruto's existence.

He made his quiet way out of the bathroom, his towel draped around his hips, he headed to his bedroom, where he slipped on something comfortable and after sitting on the bed and staring out the window into the pitch black night scene, he decided to sleep.

And so he did.

* * *

His sleep was deep and dreamless, a mere chance for him to rest his mind and body, he did not care for dreams, he was already living in one. But sleep provided him with comfort and security, something he couldn't find when he was awake.

Sometimes he wondered why he even woke up at all.

He got out of bed, trudging to the bathroom; he brushed his teeth, not daring to look into the mirror, lest he see the reflection of someone he never wanted to be – Lest he see the very image of the older brother that slaughtered his entire family.

He showered, and then dressed, his mind blank and his body raw and tired. He headed out; he had promised to meet Sakura for a physical check up he had been neglecting since his return.

He strolled the streets of Konoha, ignoring the stares people sent him, blocking out the whispers, blinding himself to the fingers that were pointed at him.

He met up with the pink-haired girl outside Ichiraku, and was surprised by that someone who accompanied her.

Uzumaki Naruto.

Naruto greeted him with a hug, and Sasuke could feel the other boy's breath against his ear, it felt strangely ticklish, a sensation that he decided he enjoyed. Sakura had smiled and patted him on the shoulder, and Sasuke decided that he liked that as well.

He walked beside Naruto the entire way to Konoha Hospital, Sakura leading the way a few paces in front. There was a comfortable silence between the two shinobi, a silence they both appreciated.

Sasuke took off his shirt, revealing to curious eyes a flawless expanse of white skin, no mark of any of the previous battles he had been through, no telling of what tortures he had ever been forced to endure.

They had been careful.

Sakura's eyes widened a fraction as she regarded his body, almost tenderly, as if she had been waiting for this moment for ever. Sasuke exhaled slowly, Naruto had been told to wait outside, but he was peering in through the window, and he seemed to like what he saw as the Uchiha's back, unbeknownst to the latter, of course.

The ebony-haired boy looked toward the gawking medic-nin expectantly, patiently waiting for her to get a hold on herself.

And five seconds later, she did.

The medical examination went on in silence, Sasuke following Sakura's directions with no objection, an unreadable expression on his face.

"Sasuke-kun, you have to eat more. You're too light to be healthy."

Sasuke made a little sound of acknowledgement, though nothing changed in his pretty features.

'What in Heaven's name did they do to you, Sasuke?' Sakura thought, and although it hurt her to see the boy look so lost, she knew she could do nothing to help him.

Sasuke pulled on his shirt, trying his best to look normal, "healthy", in front of the pink-haired girl, but failed quite miserably, instead letting out a very unplanned cough due to choke on saliva.

"Sasuke-kun, are you alright?"

He managed to wave her away amid his chain of coughs, earning himself a very worried glare from the window, though he almost didn't notice it.

He shot a glance at the window to see no one, as expected of a certain blonde dobe that happened to be one of Konoha's finest ANBU captains.

Sakura didn't catch the little smile on Sasuke's face.

* * *

Naruto walked Sasuke back in silence, and they stopped by the Ichiraku for dinner. They had trained half the day away, right after the physical examination, and both young men were now covered in a thin film of sweat, with little specks of dirt on their clothes and a flush to their faces.

And Naruto had noted, with utmost delight, that Sasuke actually looked happy.

He was happy, and that was all that mattered to Naruto right now.

He tried to reason with himself, that Sasuke was his best friend, that he was a brother, that he didn't need anything in return, that he shouldn't expect the older boy to reciprocate any of his feelings, but he knew that it never really worked; the self-reasoning.

Sasuke was beautiful, and he was attracted; it was that simple.

He saw no meaning in hiding his feelings, but right now, he just couldn't help but feel afraid, afraid that if he told the other boy about his feelings, the Uchiha would just leave again.

And he didn't want that.

He would never let Sasuke leave again.

* * *

Sasuke wasn't stupid.

He wasn't oblivious to Naruto's unconscious advances.

He noticed when Naruto had held him against the ground for a little longer than he had to, he noticed when the other boy sometimes watched over him as he slept, he noticed when Naruto would sometimes just stare at him and not say anything, he noticed when the blonde's hand lingered on his a little longer than necessary.

No, Sasuke wasn't blind.

* * *

Sasuke stopped, and Naruto stopped too, the orange glow of the setting sun bathed them, their shadows long and alien to even their owners.

"Sasuke?" Naruto turned to the smaller boy, a puzzled look on his fine features.

The older boy didn't say anything, but he pushed the blonde against the closest wall, leaning so close he could feel the other boy's heart beat.

"Sasuke?"

The ebony-haired boy again made no answer, but instead allowed himself to put his arms around the younger boy's neck, and later, allowed himself to press his lips against Naruto's firmly, secretly enjoying the feel of the taller boy's lips against his own.

He could feel the younger boy tense beneath his touch, and he could feel the hesitance of the other boy as he put his arms around his waist, pulling him closer to himself unsurely, and Sasuke felt like laughing.

_Hadn't he been like that as well when Itachi first shoved him against the wall and kissed the breath out of him?_

_FLASHBACK_

_Itachi smiled, and Sasuke felt his heart lighten up._

"_Tomorrow, Sasuke. I'll train with you tomorrow." _

_Sasuke flashed his older brother a smile that was purely bliss and innocence._

_Itachi's smile faded as he moved closer to his little brother, backing the little boy against the wall of the hallway, he positioned his arms at either side of the younger boy's head, and he inched his way so close to his little brother's face he could feel the boy's breath against his cheek. _

"_Ni-chan?" _

_Itachi pressed his lips against the little boy's cheek, earning himself a surprised gasp from his younger sibling, before moving his lips to the smaller boy's, making use of that surprise to slip his tongue into the smaller boy's mouth, taking his time in exploring the younger Uchiha's mouth, and Sasuke, afraid that he would bite off his brother's tongue, made no movement whatsoever. His older brother however, taunted his tongue to respond, moving one of the hands that had been against the wall to hold the younger boy's head, and the other one to drape around the other Uchiha's waist. _

_The older Uchiha brought their bodies closer, pressing his entire length against the smaller boy, earning himself a moan, before Sasuke finally gave in to that sweet exchange._

_END FLASHBACK_

Naruto was skilled with his tongue, really, he was.

Sasuke almost couldn't control his voice as Naruto continued his ministrations as they stumbled toward the Uchiha manner.

No one else mattered.

* * *

A/N: Yes. Umm. Yes. I'll bring in Gaara later in the story. Hope you liked this piece hahaha. That'll be all. 


	2. Chapter 2

Title : Nostalgia.

Rating : NC 16

Summary: "This is the line that marks insanity, Sasuke."

He made a line in the dirt in front of him with his foot.

"Cross it."

Pairing : ItaSasu, NaruSasu, and slight GaaSasu.

* * *

Sasuke slipped out of bed, making no sound as he made his way to the bathroom, not waking the blonde that was currently in deep slumber. It was sticky, the trail of dried semen that ran down his thighs; and it was extremely uncomfortable, already crusting, he cursed softly as he turned on the water, squirting a little body foam on his hand, and he proceeded to cleaning himself, rubbing at his arms, his neck. He leaned against the glass panel, turning his head to the side, he sighed, faintly amused at how the transparent pane frosted at the warmth of his breath.

_It was the only proof that he was still alive._

He let his thoughts wander, blankly watching the water run into the drainage.

_He just slept with his best friend._

He never thought he would actually stoop so low for physical contact.

He almost winced as he heard the covers rustle, signaling that the other boy, no, MAN, was now awake.

"Sasuke?" It was frightening; the way Naruto's voice made his heart beat just a little faster.

He remained silent, snapping out of his daze, he continued washing himself.

He tensed as he heard Naruto draw nearer to the open bathroom door.

"Sasuke..." The taller boy almost sounded relieved, and he slipped in, closing the door behind him, he cautiously inched his way toward the Uchiha.

Naruto didn't dare move too close; like if he did, the ebony-haired boy would just disappear in a puff of smoke.

He didn't even dare believe last night actually happened.

He was afraid.

He was afraid when he woke up to find the bed empty, afraid when he wasn't holding onto a particular pale, skinny, raven-haired boy who was just a few months older than him.

He was afraid he was discarded again.

He was pulled back to reality when his ears picked up the slightest of Sasuke's voice.

"...Naruto."

He didn't know what it was that possessed him to take those few steps closer to the Uchiha, to enter the shower stall and press him against the glass, what possessed him to claim those beautiful lips.

He was answered with a little moan, and then those wonderful arms came to circle his neck, pulling him closer still; the shower head was dropped to the floor with a 'clunk', unimportant, forgotten.

* * *

The soft rustling of sand was carried off by the wind; light footsteps that would have gone unnoticed made its presence on the soil of Konoha.

Flame red hair was combed by the gentle breeze, the gourd on his back proudly proclaiming his identity, pale skin kissed by the sun's rays, jade green eyes that seemed to pierce through everything they fell upon scanned the gates, the brief tilt of his head to acknowledge the existence of the guard on duty almost went unnoticed, and he looked up, almost as if he was challenging the brightness of the sky above his head, before lowering his sharp gaze, silently regarding the people on the streets who now stared in fear.

_There was little of anything else but fear in their eyes._

He made his slow progress to the Hokage's Building.

* * *

A black cloak flapped in the strong breeze, the red cloud insignia seemed just alive, blood red eyes regarded the people whose faces they were met with coldly. A scarred forehead protector glinted; a fair hand reached up to a perfectly sculpted face to brush away a stray lock of raven black hair, before touching the tall collar of the coat, adjusting it slightly, exposing the scarlet ring on his right ring finger, a mark of power.

His footsteps were soundless. People normally didn't notice him; he made sure they didn't.

But he was there, in the very place he had abandoned so readily before, the village he betrayed without turning back. And he wanted to pay a visit to someone he held close to his heart.

Someone he would _kill _for.

No, somebody he _already_ killed for.

* * *

Onyx eyes snapped open; Sasuke was panting, beads of sweat gathering on his brow.

He had the worst feeling of foreboding.

Naruto was beside him, a strong tanned arm cradled him at the waist, and he willed himself to calm down, lest he wake the other boy. He watched the blonde's leveled breathing, somehow instilling a sense of security in his being; he closed his eyes again, letting himself relax his muscles again, leaning into the younger boy's embrace a little more.

'_So this is how it feels to be loved.'_

He stiffened when he realized what he had just thought, shaking his head; he opened his eyes again, blinking a few times.

_No, no, no. He couldn't afford to get used to this. _

Naruto stirred, and Sasuke tensed as the grip of his waist tightened.

"What's wrong?" A tanned face nuzzled his shoulder, causing him to unintentionally stiffen.

Naruto didn't pull back though.

_No, not this time._

He held the pale boy in place, planting soft kisses on the boy's neck and shoulders; he gently turned Sasuke over so that they were face-to-face.

"I'm not letting you go again, Sasuke." His fingers ran over the ebony-haired boy's skin.

"...Not again. Not in this lifetime." He pulled the smaller boy into his arms, burying his face in the shorter boy's shoulder; he inhaled, clearly savoring the Uchiha's scent.

And because of this action, he didn't catch the expression on the latter's face.

* * *

"The Hokage will see you now, Uchiha-san."

Sasuke stood, the area between his legs still a bit sore after Naruto's brutal claim the night before, but he made little of it, making his way into the Hokage's office bravely, he closed the door behind him.

Immediately he heard the rustle of sand, and he could practically _taste _the killing intent in the air.

"Ah, Sasuke...You have a visitor."

Sasuke lifted his gaze, widening slightly as they regarded the boy, no, MAN who stood before him now.

Sabaku no Gaara.

The Sand shinobi had grown; he was almost as tall as the blonde dobe, his eyes still that same shade of cold green, his hair a flaming red, the word 'ai' a perfect contrast to pale skin.

Gaara stepped forward, regarding the Leaf shinobi with blatant interest.

"So it _is_ true."

Sasuke tensed as the red head moved closer, in a full circle around him.

"It's not genjitsu."

He slowly raised a hand, as if to touch the Uchiha's face, but he stopped short of it.

"Uchiha Sasuke came back."

The Kazekage slowly put his hand down, smiling a little, he turned to the Hokage.

"Uchiha Sasuke came back. I did not believe it when I first heard of it; I had to come see for myself..."

He turned back to the Uchiha, as if he was amazed the other boy was still alive.

"Is Orochimaru of no more?" The look of anger that flashed across the ebony-haired boy's face was gone as soon as it came.

"Yes, his head was brought in when Sasuke came back."

The Hokage's face was stern, void of much emotion as her gaze settled on the Kazekage.

The raven-haired boy let out an almost inaudible growl as he stood in place, obviously not enjoying the direction the conversation was heading at all.

There was silence from the Kazekage, a nod, and then a slight forced smile.

"I see."

Gaara turned to face Sasuke again, his eyes glinting with amusement.

"You _have_ become stronger, Uchiha."

Sasuke felt like laughing, a kind of sick, twisted happiness overcame him.

'_Not quite strong enough.' _

The red head sighed somewhat wistfully, his eyes never leaving the Uchiha's face. The Hokage cleared her throat a little, before addressing the Konoha Shinobi before her.

"Sasuke, I think now is a good time to bring the Kazekage around. It's been a while since he's been here, and since the Sand is on good terms with us, I'd like you to make sure he's entertained."

Sasuke scowled.

* * *

Naruto ran a hand through his hair, he sighed, eyeing the red head with fake anger, he put his hands on his hips.

"What took you so long to visit?"

Gaara's expression remained unchanged for a few seconds, but a smirk slowly graced his lips.

"I am Kazekage, Uzumaki Naruto, and I am _busy_, unlike some of the people here."

Naruto was comforted for a moment – Gaara hadn't changed a bit, because everything that left the Kazekage's mouth the last time they met were blatant insults as well. Of course, that was before he absorbed what exactly it was the Kazekage meant.

"What the hell do you mean? That I'm a free loader?" He glared at the red head, before leaning closer and lowering his voice.

"I'm ANBU, IF YOU DON'T MIND."

The Kazekage smirked again, now turning to face Sasuke, who had been silent in the corner spacing out, he just stared.

"Uchiha."

Sasuke jumped a little, feeling extremely awkward at being caught absorbed in his own thoughts, he bowed his head a little, unconsciously, before he realized what he was doing, he immediately sat up straight, his eyes empty as he stared back at the Kazekage in question.

"You are not to space out in my presence."

The Uchiha's anger flared a little, but he remained silent, which puzzled the Sand shinobi greatly, for the Uchiha Sasuke he knew before would have argued back and tried to pick a fight.

...Uchiha Sasuke had changed.

_But of course...They were no longer children._

The red head regarded Sasuke from head to toe again, and he had to admit, the boy had grown up pretty well, his perfect features showed little sign of severe fatigue, his body though slight was well toned, slim and seemingly agile. The hair that framed his face and crowned his head showed little change, perhaps maybe it had grown longer over time? Gaara couldn't really tell.

It was almost as if the ebony-haired boy could feel the Kazekage's eyes on him, because he visibly tensed, his beautiful obsidian eyes darting to Naruto for a second, before focusing on the Kazekage, almost as if he was eager to make eye contact to declare that he wasn't afraid.

...And he wasn't.

And it was at this moment Naruto decided to take Sasuke into his arms, clean off the floor, as if telling Gaara to 'back off', with a look that said, 'Sasuke's mine'.

"You're looking at Sasuke as if you want to eat him."

Gaara looked at the blonde pointedly, easily figuring out the relationship between the two, he smirked, deciding to have a little more fun.

"And what if I do?" Naruto's muscles tensed visibly, increasing his hold on the Uchiha, completely ignoring the ebony-haired boy's weak pushes and harsh whispers to let him down.

"Naruto! Put me down!" Gaara let his eyes linger on the slim Konoha shinobi again, this time taking in how pleasant his features looked, actually making an effort to appreciate the pretty features on the Uchiha's face, how pink and soft his lips looked as they moved, how pretty the blush settling on his cheeks made him, how his dark eyes and lashes fluttered close and open again in every blink.

And he turned away, making his way deeper into the city of Konoha.

* * *

A/N: Thanks much for the people who reviewed! I'm so sorry I took so long. I kinda forgot to publish this...Umm. I've brought in Gaara! Whee! xD Umm. Yes. Please be nice and _review_! Forgive me for any mistake that you may see up there and I _really_, _really_, _really_ hope you enjoyed it!


	3. Chapter 3

Title : Nostalgia.

Rating : NC 16

Summary: "This is the line that marks insanity, Sasuke."

He made a line in the dirt in front of him with his foot.

"Cross it."

Pairing : ItaSasu, NaruSasu, and slight GaaSasu.

A/N: THANK YOU, ALL WHO REVIEWED!! XDDD You all make me so happy I want to cry!

* * *

The Kazekage would stay in Konoha for three days, and Sasuke was to pick him up every morning for those three days to give him a tour of Konoha, with Naruto's aid, of course. They had largely spent the three days talking, catching up, and walking around town.

"However did you become ANBU, Naruto?" Gaara titled his head a little to look at the blonde, distracted from his plate of Takoyaki, his face expressionless with a hint of wonder.

Naruto's eyebrow twitched.

"Just what do you mean by that? I got in the way no one else could! By sheer COOLNESS."

Sasuke couldn't help but raise a slender eyebrow.

An action the other two men almost didn't catch.

A nudge almost made him chuckle, a small smile sent his way by the Kazekage, and he felt strangely content, even with Naruto's overly loud voice making a racket in his ear, he felt content, _happy_, sitting at a Takoyaki stand with Gaara and Naruto.

_This is...nice._

_This was what life was supposed to be._

Sasuke took another bite of his Takoyaki, smiling a little on the inside at the foolish and somewhat childish exchange between the quiet red head that sat to his right who was chewing on his food demurely and the loud blonde that sat to his left, facing the other way, leaning against the little long table they were all eating at as if owned it, long legs spread out beneath him, in a relaxed manner.

And then they all felt it.

A cold, _powerful _sharp look from somewhere nearby that screamed killing intent.

They had all immediately readied themselves unconsciously, though not moving a muscle.

Sasuke felt a sense of familiarity, an uncanny sense of nostalgia.

_He knew this gaze._

Naruto snapped them all out of that trance, speaking softly.

"Where do you think it's coming from?"

Gaara had remained silent, Sasuke turned to his side a little, almost as if he had something to say to Naruto, instead his eyes searching, Sharingan on.

And he saw it.

The cold, expressionless face of his older brother staring straight at him, from behind the people who were walking about doing their daily business on the street, and he whirled around to face the man completely, in more disbelief than anger, but his brother had gone as suddenly as he had appeared.

A hand from his left startled him.

"Sasuke?"

Wide scarlet eyes looked to Naruto, before turning to spare a glance at Gaara, and he lowered his head, as if thinking about something that pained him, before he turned again only to say,

"_Don't follow me_."

And he disappeared.

* * *

He had followed Itachi's faint chakra signature all the way to the old Uchiha estates, the place where his entire family was murdered.

_The place where he was forced to become what he was. _

A small frown took over his lips as he made his quiet way inside the old estate, a hundred memories crashing into his brain, haunting him, mocking him.

_This was the first tree he climbed. _

_This was the place where he hid the stray kitten he found in the rain._

_This was the place he would go when he didn't want to be bothered. _

_This was the place where he first learned how to make a paper boat._

_This was the place he flew his first kite._

_This was his entire world. _

And the person who took it all away from him had come back.

The person he vowed to kill.

His _brother_, Uchiha Itachi.

And he would do it.

He made his way into the thicket, one of the places only him and his brother and a few of the other Uchiha knew.

_But the others were all dead._

Familiar grass crunched under his feet, familiar smell of the air, familiar landscape and trees.

He spotted the figure in black by the small pond, his black high-collared cloak was off his shoulders and on the floor, laid out neatly beside him as he stared out at the fishes in the water, red eyes not bothering to greet the younger Uchiha that had just intruded, his posture completely relaxed, the water reflected the sun's orange rays onto his pale, expressionless face.

He almost looked _normal._

_Like a normal adult, a normal man. Someone who didn't slaughter his entire family for power. _

Sasuke finally found his voice.

"What are you doing here?"

There was no answer, not even an acknowledgement that he was there.

A small little speck of anger flared in Sasuke's being.

_How dare he come back, how dare he come back to this place, how dare he not acknowledge me! _

Sasuke pulled out a kunai when the other Uchiha turned away from him, a soft, deep voice greeting his ears.

"I came for you because you didn't come for me, Sasuke."

A look of confusion flashed in Sasuke's features, a look of irritation and then anger.

"YOU were the person who kept running from me! Now that I'm taking a break and actually LIVING MY LIFE, you have to come back and wreck it all, AGAIN?"

A small chuckle left his brother's lips, a cold, unfeeling sound.

"You aren't living _your_ life, Sasuke. You're living the life _I_ gave you."

Sasuke's muscles tensed, an unspeakable fury boiling in his spirit.

"Shut up! You have no right to say that to me." His voice was trembling, he knew it was, but no, he wouldn't give way. He stormed toward the older Uchiha, who made no movement whatsoever, grabbing the mesh shirt he was wearing; he shoved his brother against the closest tree, pressing the kunai to his neck, he glared at that all too familiar face from under ebony locks.

_He wouldn't let the tears in his eyes start to fall. _

"...You bastard! You didn't give me a _life_, you bastard! You just gave me a bloody excuse to _keep my heart beating_; nothing more, nothing less."

Itachi raised a fine eyebrow.

"...And that is not life, Sasuke?" A warm hand moved to cover his, but he pulled away, taking a step back.

"No, it's not."

The Akatsuki member took a step towards his brother, who in turn stepped back, _away from him_.

"Then tell me, Sasuke..."

"Stop, stop it."

"Tell me, what is life?"

"Shut up, bastard."

"_What_ is life to you, Sasuke?"

"Why won't you just leave me alone?"

"Is life something I can't give you?"

Sasuke was silent; he was at the edge of the pond, looking into the water.

"Is it something I can't give you, Sasuke?"

Sasuke turned away from his brother, angry, confused, and hurt.

"Yes, Niisan. It's something you can't give me."

A look of anger and disappointment crossed Itachi's features.

"Even if I tried?"

Sasuke paused, turning to look at his brother, a little stunned.

Silence greeted the older Uchiha's ears, but somewhere deep inside; he thought he knew Sasuke's answer.

_...Even if you tried._

"Leave me alone, Uchiha Itachi. I want no more to do with you. I will no longer be that foolish child that'll follow your lead, no longer be that _ignorant idiot_ that _vowed_ to _gut_ you for the massacre of my family."

Every word seemed to drip with hate, but something warm peeked out from underneath.

"Sasuke."

A familiar hand touched his wrist; he let familiar arms close in around him, that familiar voice whisper sweet words into his ear.

"Sasuke?"

He immediately broke away from the older Uchiha, eyes darting to the source of intrusion.

Uzumaki Naruto.

He looked to his brother, angry with himself that he had almost let himself fall back into what he used to be, angry with Itachi fro coming back, angry with Naruto for following him.

"What are you doing here, Naruto?"

"I...followed you, but that's not important. That's Uchiha Itachi!"

The older Uchiha chuckled at his name being mentioned, before starting to turn and walk away.

Sasuke's irritation flared up again.

"Where are YOU going?"

The older Uchiha didn't bother to turn, instead, just said simply,

"I'm leaving you alone."

"What?"

"I'm not going to let you be that foolish child that followed my lead, or the ignorant idiot who vowed to gut me for the massacre of your family. _Our family_."

Itachi smiled, a weak smile.

This has been dragging on for much too long.

The blonde boy made his way to Sasuke's side, earning him a glare from the older Uchiha, feeling that bloody gaze on him sent shivers down his spine – the Akatsuki member almost looked _possessive_.

Sasuke had kept silent, his elegant brows furrowed with a myriad of emotions that bordered on fury.

"I've outgrown all this shit, Itachi. I won't be controlled anymore."

Sasuke turned away, touching Naruto gently on the arm, almost affectionately, pulling him towards the exit.

"Do what you like."

Uchiha Itachi was left standing alone, in the place he had held most dear, by the one single person he continued living for.

_It was...over._

* * *

They were walking in pregnant silence, two shinobi, two men, two friends, two lovers.

Sasuke began speaking first.

"Why did you follow me?"

Naruto had looked up surprised, confused, and a little afraid.

Sasuke spoke again when he received no answer.

"I asked you a question, Naruto."

The blonde had opened his mouth to say something, but stopped.

Sasuke took note of this, and tried to improve things by taking Naruto's hand in his and squeezing it encouragingly.

"Are you scared of me, Naruto?"

_Please don't be._

The Kyuubi vessel made no sound, but instead pulled the raven-haired boy into an embrace, tighter than any had been so far.

_Naruto was so close it felt real. _

"I'd never be afraid of _you_, Sasuke."

_I'm afraid of losing you._

The smaller shinobi smiled a little, his breath ghosting over the younger boy's ear.

"Promise me."

Naruto pulled away to look Sasuke in the eyes.

"I promise."


	4. Chapter 4

Title : Nostalgia.  
Rating : NC 16  
Summary: "This is the line that marks insanity, Sasuke."  
He made a line in the dirt in front of him with his foot.  
"Cross it."  
Pairing : ItaSasu, NaruSasu, and slight GaaSasu.

* * *

Sasuke broke away from the kiss, allowing himself to be pinned against the wall, he closed his eyes, so tired, so tired.

The skilled hands that slipped under his over-sized shirt were warm and comforting, leaving burning trails on his abdomen and chest, eventually sliding the article of clothing off him, and he made a sound, a soft mewl.

"Itachi..." He breathed, the name just rolling off his tongue, so natural, so in place.

_Itachi, Itachi, Itachi._

_I live for you._

The lips on his throat had increased its vigor at the mention of their owner's name, eliciting another small sound from the younger Uchiha's lips.

_Itachi, Itachi, Itachi..._

* * *

Sasuke opened his eyes.

Naruto's arm was still around his middle, resting at the place where his hips met his waist; Sasuke's head was propped against Naruto's chest, the sure, secure breathing of the blonde made him feel safe.

Ebony eyes lowered, resting on the pale hand that lay carelessly on the tanned chest he was leaning against.

_Desperate. That was what he was._

_That was he always has been_.

He tensed as the blonde stirred, the arm around him tightening, pulling him against the Kyuubi container. He made a small noise as his thigh brushed against an extremely awkward place somewhere in Naruto's nether regions.

"Sasuke..."

His name sounded so right from those wonderful set of lips, the voice that spoke it soft and deep, so mature, so different from the loud, high-pitched vocals he had been so used to hearing from what seemed like yesterday.

Pale fingers reached up to greet those very lips, relishing in their softness, allowing himself a small sense of triumph as he inched closer to the blonde, not waking him, pressing his lips to Naruto's, sucking on the younger man's bottom lip almost playfully, planting small butterfly kisses on whiskered cheeks and a firm jaw.

_Almost as if the dream had never happened._

"Naruto..." he whispered, trailing a finger over the blonde's collar bone and down his chest, earning him a small groan and a flutter of eye lashes.

He whispered the younger man's name again, this time pulling himself up to straddle him, he leaned close enough that their lips brushed, but never touched, chuckling softly when he saw the blonde lean forward a little, as if searching for him.

_Like he always did._

Finally, blue eyes met onyx ones, and Naruto had smiled, a bright, happy and lazy smile.

"Good morning to you too."

Sasuke smiled against his lips, a small one, but a smile nonetheless.

_Itachi wouldn't win_.

"Naruto..."

Sasuke's voice was soft, calm, relaxed.

"Naruto, tell me I'm yours."

Naruto thought he heard wrong.

"...What?"

Sasuke leaned forward, his entire weight now against the arms on either side of Naruto's head, a small smug look on his face.

"Tell me I belong to you."

Blue eyes met onyx ones again, and this time, they didn't break eye-contact.

_Anything, anything. _

_I live for you._

A strong hand found its way to the Uchiha's slender nape.

"You're mine."

Naruto pulled the Uchiha in for a brutal, passionate kiss, crushing his lips against the Uchiha's full ones, his insides almost dying of happiness and achievement, his eyes watering with tears that were supposed to have been shed the day Sasuke left.

"_You're mine_."

* * *

Gaara sat on the roof, eyeing the slow setting sun; his cold jade eyes were sharp and critical.

The wind combed his hair, softly, gently.

* * *

Itachi gathered his cloak around him, making his slow way into a clearing, his eyes a faded ebony that were empty and cold, trying to think and kill that empty, empty feeling that pitted in his heart.

His footsteps were the only sounds that reached his ears as he walked toward the centre of the clearing, setting one foot against the remnants of a dead tree on the ground, he looked up, thinking, before finally deciding on what to do with his present situation.

He was going to get Sasuke back.

…even if it was the last thing he would ever do.

He lowered his head again, his eyes empty except for a certain shimmer, and he set off toward the thicket again, a small smile upon his perfect lips.

_Itachi would win again._

_Because he always did._

* * *

Sasuke settled down on the roof top, pulling his legs up, he rested his chin on his knee, staring off into the nightscape of Konohagakure. Gaara had greeted him the way he would, a small nod as an acknowledgement. There was a reigning silence for a while; they heard the blonde making a lot of noise with his pots and pans while he made dinner.

"So you gave it all up for this."

Sasuke looked up, surprised.

He didn't answer, settling for just looking out to the cityscape again.

"...You gave it all up for him."

Gaara got up, his lithe, muscular form towering over the ebony-haired boy, a small look that said volumes on his features, he touched the side of Sasuke's face, pulling it against his hip, almost as if he was trying to comfort the other boy. Sasuke didn't resist.

He didn't want to.

Gaara's hands were welcome, and warm. Almost like his mother's.

"You're making the right choice, I hope."

Sasuke opened his eyes slowly, unaware of when he closed them.

"I know I am."

..._is what he wanted to say._

"He loves you."

"...I know."

"You have people who are willing to die for you, Uchiha."

Sasuke closed his eyes again, resting against the hip he was leaning against.

"...You have people who are willing to _kill_ for you."

Gaara pulled away, running a hand through his red hair, he turned away from the younger man.

He made his way back into the house.

"Take care of yourself, Uchiha."

_He wanted to be able to say he could._

* * *

Itachi watched from his vantage point, every movement his little brother made, very gentle comb of his hair by the wind, every calm breath he took.

_What had Sasuke done to him?_

_I can't live without you._

_...It's not over yet._

_It never would be._

* * *

Obsession.

He was obsessed.

What was it that drove him to such extremes, again?

The smiles? The laughter? The innocence?

The epitome of everything he wasn't?

"_You can't turn him into another me."_

"_Sasuke's just not good enough."_

"_He's trying his best."_

"_His best just isn't enough."_

He hated them.

Silently. Secretly. Hated all of them.

_He padded across the wooden flooring, not bothering to mute the noise he was making; they knew he was there already. _

_Fugaku greeted him at the door._

"_Welcome back, son."_

_Itachi didn't answer, his eyes instead roaming the room, sweeping across the faces of the Uchiha elders as well as his father._

"_Itachi."_

_His father's voice was firm, commanding attention._

_His scarlet eyes fell on his father's face surely. _

"_Itachi...we know what you've been doing."_

_He shifted his gaze sharply, now regarding one of the clan elders silently._

"_...With Sasuke." _

_The teenager's eyes narrowed. _

"_Itachi."_

_His father looked at him almost apathetically._

"_Itachi, we can overlook this tiny fault-"_

_**They called this a fault.**_

"_-we can just pretend it never happened-"_

_**They want me to pretend "we" never happened.**_

"_-and just explain everything to Sasuke. He's still young, I'm sure he'll forget it in time-"_

_**They want you to "forget".**_

"_-We can bury all this sin and no one will ever find out. We just want the best for the both of you, Itachi."_

_**They called "us" sin.**_

"_We're giving you another chance."_

Itachi narrowed his gaze; his fist clenched so hard his knuckles were white, his colored nails digging into the soft skin of his palm, hard enough to draw blood.

His plan will fall into action in three days.

* * *

A/N: Sasuke needs social services. Really.  
Thank all you readers so much! I'm really sorry that I'm such a lazy bum and that I take about ten thousand years to write! You all know I love you! Review some more! And yes, a FULL LEMON may be coming up in the next chapter! And _you can have your say_ in who you want Sasuke to be with in the end! Naruto? Itachi? Hahahah! (Oh gawds, I feel like I'm selling the story.) Oh well. Anyhow, _do_ send in your comments! Much love and thanks,

Forbiddenist


	5. Chapter 5

Title : Nostalgia

Title : Nostalgia.

Rating : NC 16

Summary: "This is the line that marks insanity, Sasuke."

He made a line in the dirt in front of him with his foot.

"Cross it."

Pairing : ItaSasu, NaruSasu, and slight GaaSasu.

* * *

Blood.

It was everywhere.

On the floor, the curtains, the walls.

_Everywhere._

The red attacked him from _everywhere._  
The same red from the pair of eyes that were watching him so apathetically, almost coldly.  
The tangy metallic smell assaulted his nose, and he backed against a wall, away from the red, away from the red.

His legs felt weak, and he collapsed to the floor, shivering; his throat so dry from fear he couldn't even scream.

* * *

Sasuke gasped, sitting up straight and covering his ears.

That dream again.

It's been so many years since he's had that dream.

He kicked the sheets off, ignoring the presence of the blonde beside him; he padded his way to the bathroom, a sudden nausea taking over his senses.

He stopped at the sink, turning on the tap and letting the cold water run over his hands he brought both hands to the sides of his face, almost covering his ears again.

He could almost smell the blood.

"Sasuke?"

His head whipped to face the direction of the sound, almost taking a step back in shock, his eyes wide and afraid, taking a moment to recognize the worried expression on that familiar tanned face.

"Sasuke, are you alright?"

The raven-haired boy didn't reply, instead he just kept staring at Naruto's face, although his expression had apparently calmed down. Naruto took a few steps closer to the pale boy, cautiously.  
The older boy opened his mouth to speak.

"Naruto, I-"

He found himself pulled into a tight embrace before he could finish his sentence, Naruto's body warmth against him so real and comforting.

"Don't scare me like that."

_He can't save me._

_He can't save me._

They stayed that way for a while.

Sasuke pulled away, standing up almost abruptly, he gave Naruto a look that said he was sorry, before heading into the bed room to slip on a shirt and pants, and leaving through the window.

Naruto had punched a hole in the wall.

* * *

"Why won't you disappear?"

Itachi didn't respond, instead he continued to focus on the soft glow of the water under the moonlight.

_You knew this would happen._

Sasuke took a step closer to his older brother.

_You knew that no matter what, I would always come running back to you._

"...You bastard."

Itachi tilted his head to the side, his posture unchanging, relaxed, resting on the soft padding of the grass.

Sasuke started to tear.

_I live for you._

"...Bastard..."

He fell to his knees, the sobs choking him, slowly suffocating him with self-loathing and shame.

The soft hand on his cheek was cold.  
The lips that touched his forehead were cold.

_You..._

_...were always there, an untouchable...god._

_My god._

His eyes fluttered close, a soft sigh escaping his lips as graceful hands found their place in his hair.

_Always so brutally gentle._

"It was genjitsu, Little Brother."

Sasuke didn't care. He didn't respond, he was too busy choking back the tears that threatened to overwhelm him – No weakness, no weakness. Not in front of Itachi.

"I felt I needed to remind you who made you who you are today."

The hands came to rest on his cheek.

_Cold. _

_Like a snowflake's kiss._

"...to remind you that you're living on _my grace_."

A tongue ran along the shell of his ear.

"You're _mine." _

_You'll never be rid of Uchiha Itachi. _

The younger Uchiha lowered his head, resting against his older brother's chest. Familiar hands found his waist, pulling him against Itachi's strong, lithe form.

"No on- _Nothing_ will ever change this fact, little brother. I own you. I bought you."

Sasuke's hands tightened against Itachi's cloak, all in anger and frustration and denial.  
His soft pleas for that deep voice to stop went unheeded.

"Your price was the entire family's blood."

Sasuke crumbled.

_I hate you, I hate you, I hate you!_

"Why couldn't you just leave me alone?"

He was shouting now, even though his voice was weak and hoarse.  
His brother's breath felt warm on his face.

"I'm a selfish person, Sasuke."

Cool fingers put pressure on the back of his neck. Itachi's lips against his left cheek, a mock of a kiss.

"If I can't have you, no one will even come close to doing so."  
He wanted to push him away, to scream and stab him.

...But he just couldn't.

He was so tired of all this shit.

_You've always been like that._

_...never settling for second place._

"I just wanted a shot at a life that didn't have you."

Itachi paused, his breathing slow and steady. Unhurried, calm.  
He smiled.  
"You should have known that would be impossible before you even tried it, Sasuke."  
The young man in his arms laughed.

A bitter, ugly laugh.

"I knew. I knew. But yet-"

"You did it for him."

Sasuke didn't look up when he heard sandals crunching the grass from behind him.  
Itachi's eyes narrowed at the intruder.  
Naruto's insides boiled with insuppressible anger, he felt every fiber of his being burning, screaming, urging him to hurt.

"Don't touch him."

Itachi suppressed a laugh.

Sasuke tensed as familiar lips rested against his ear.  
His speech was soft, but loud enough for the blonde to hear.

"Remember, Sasuke? When I used to love you, when no one else would care?"  
The younger Uchiha shivered.  
"Remember how I used to hold you against the wall when our parents were out, how I used to claim your delectable lips, stealing those sweet, _sinful_ sounds from the back of your beautiful throat?"  
It was no longer directed at Sasuke, his words.

"Remember how I would gently touch you, _take _you-"  
"THAT'S ENOUGH."

Sasuke was clutching his sleeve so tightly his knuckles were turning white.  
Naruto was looking down, glaring down at the grass in anger, disgust and frustration.

"Don't say anymore."

Sasuke found the strength to take a step away from his older brother, his eyes blood red with Sharingan, an unspoken hatred and hurt communicated through his gaze.  
Naruto took a step forward, almost as if he wanted to pull Sasuke back.

"Don't come near me."

Naruto paused, half in fear and worry, and the other half in confusion.  
Itachi had moved two steps backward.

"This is the line that marks insanity, Sasuke."

He made a line in the dirt in front of him with his foot.

"Cross it."

Sasuke's eyes fell onto the line, a small look of disbelief on his face.

_...Never settling for second place._

_Always first._

Sasuke shut his eyes, taking a deep breath.  
He stared at the hand that held his wrist.

"Naruto..."

"Sasuke, please..."

_Don't leave. _

_Not again._

_Don't leave me._

He held the blonde's hand in his own for a while.

_I'm yours._

He stepped over the line.

* * *

**A/N: I'm so sorry! I **_**absolutely promise there will be a lemon in the next chapter**_**!! I'm sorry I took so long to update too. I've been really busy. Reviews are love. X( P.S. I know the time skips are awfully confusing, but pleaser bare with them. Dx  
**


	6. Chapter 6

Title : Nostalgia.

Rating : NC 17

Summary: "This is the line that marks insanity, Sasuke."

He made a line in the dirt in front of him with his foot.

"Cross it."

Pairing : ItaSasu, NaruSasu, and slight GaaSasu...and because I can't decide it's newly ItaNaruSasu. xP

* * *

Naruto didn't know how to react.

_No, no, no, no, no._

_Not again._

But he was left in a silence that consumed his very being.

* * *

Cool hands slipped his shirt off his head; the rustling of cloth as it slid onto the floor quickened his breath. He dared not to open his eyes as warm lips planted butterfly kisses along his collar bone, it was all so familiar, the overload of his senses, the immense pleasure he derived from his older brother's subtle hands. Full petal lips ghosted over his own, teasing him, challenging him.

_This was sin. _

The older Uchiha pulled the younger boy to him only to flip him over and press him against the wall, the boy's fast-breathing patterns delighting him. He exerted a little pressure of the fair arm he was holding onto, leaning in to nibble on the younger boy's ear lobe, reveling in the little sharp intakes of breath.

"Itachi..."

A sharp bite made Sasuke wince.

The younger Uchiha looked up in slight annoyance, mixed with confusion.

"Wrong answer."

Sasuke's eyes narrowed.

_You sick, sick bastard._

Kisses rained on the back of the younger Uchiha's shoulders, as those same cool hands slid down the plane of his stomach, as if memorizing the feel of it until they reached the waist of his pants and stopped. Itachi's chin rested on his shoulder, a skilled hand cupping the area between his legs – messaging it expertly.

Sweet delicious friction.

Sasuke let out a small gasp as the rubbing got a little more intense, vision glaze from the building pleasure; his hands trying to grip whatever he could of the wall before him, his face burning up as the temperature rose somewhere down south. He started panting, resting his forehead against the wall for support as one of the hands slipped into his pants, his brother still pressing against him from behind, almost aggressively, trying to hold him in place – his brother's erection making itself painfully evident against his ass.

"Tsk, tsk, Otouto. No underwear?"

Itachi kissed his cheek, his hand slowly stroking, forcing the moans from the younger man's throat, not making any move to get rid of the fabric that he knew felt prickly and uncomfortable to his little brother's skin, he ran his tongue down a perfect nape.

"Nii-san-"

At this, Itachi pulled, and the black material that was Sasuke's pants fell to the floor.

Sasuke was pushed against the wall, his hands the only things keeping him from being pressed fully against it, Itachi mercilessly bit down into the younger Uchiha's shoulder, earning himself a grunt of pain laced with pleasure. The fair hand that wasn't stroking him had at some point in time made contact with a pert nipple.

_Powerless, weak._

_But you liked this._

Itachi's arm came to rest around his waist, an almost comforting gesture, his head resting on his younger brother's shoulder, the hand unceasing.

"Nii-san, please..."

_Break me._

Itachi drew away from the younger Uchiha completely, leaving him hanging for a while, his eyes happily trailing down that smooth back – one that was so familiar yet foreign to him now.

"You've grown, Sasuke."

Sasuke stifled a morbid chuckle, turning around quite sluggishly to face his older brother, he offered a smirk.

"Of course I have."

The younger boy leaned against the wall, his hands doing their best to find enough friction against the wall to hold him up, unable to rely on his trembling knees, baring his neck to the man before him, he exhaled slowly, tilting his head slightly to the side, dark eyes never leaving scarlet ones; challenging them.

He licked his lips.

Itachi had smiled.

"On your knees."

The pale young man sank to his knees obediently, silently hating himself for it, his heart quickening as he anticipated what the older Uchiha was going to make him do.

No, what the older Uchiha would _wait _for him to do.

Itachi stepped closer to the boy now, the bulge in the front of his pants quite obvious by now, and he let out a sigh as he felt teeth scrape against it, his eyes making contact with similarly red ones, forcing himself to hold back the moan that threatened to sound as he watched his younger brother – the object of his _obsession_ – kneeling on the floor and teasing him, without ceasing eye contact.

It was _incredibly_ arousing.

Nimble fingers made quick work of the button, and Itachi caught them just before they reached his zipper.

"Use your teeth."

Sasuke's eyes narrowed.

_You sick, sick bastard._

Teeth found the metal, and pulled, slowly, jerkily, as Itachi slipped his fingers through silken strands, resisting all urge to just force the boy to go faster.

And then his brother's tongue touched his heated flesh. He jerked, letting out a hiss, unintentionally brushing against Sasuke's cheek, smearing precum on flawless skin. He was countered with a glare, before that hot mouth enveloped his tip, his little brother's tongue leaving a trail of magma in its wake. He almost gasped when he felt the light scraping of teeth against flesh, his hand tightened in his brother's hair.

Sasuke hummed, smirking as his brother let out a small sigh.

_Attention, attention. It's all I wanted. _

He increased the suction as well as the tempo, forcing his gag reflex back, he pushed down, inwardly smiling as his brother grunted, his hands forcing the younger Uchiha to continue.

"Sas...uke..."

The younger man pulled away right before his brother's release, silently cursing as hot spurts of cum made contact with his face. He made to wipe it away, but familiar hands held them at bay.

"Aniki?" He glared at the older man, but didn't protest as Itachi brought his face closer and started licking, and Sasuke almost laughed. A hot tongue wiped every last bit off his face, and soon those full-petal lips once again started to devour his mouth. He could taste Itachi. He sighed, giving his older brother full access.

"Aniki, please..."

He shuddered as a hand trailed down his hip, sliding along his thigh to spread his legs apart.

_Is this what you wanted?_

Sasuke was holding his breath as he watched that hand disappear in between his legs, knowing fair well where they were heading. He almost winced as a dry finger pushed into him.

"Aniki!" He fought the urge to shove his brother's hand away from him, instead clutching onto his brother's sleeve for dear life.

The finger was removed; its owner now actually bothering with lubricant, Itachi produced a small bottle from his back pocket, smearing it over three fingers he stood, gesturing for Sasuke to do the same. The younger Uchiha was pushed against the wall roughly once more, cursing as his shoulder made contact in a bad way. His arms were held firmly behind him, a knee gracefully pushing his legs apart, he rested his forehead against the wall as he braced himself for what would come.

Itachi was pleased with the sharp intake of breath from the body he was pressing against, and smiling, he scissored the fingers that were inside his brother's entrance, resisting all calls to just take his brother raw.

_Be gentle. _

_Be everything that you're not. _

_...For him._

The older Uchiha thrust the two fingers in harshly, earning himself a grunt, before the boy retaliated by pushing his hips downward, impaling himself further.

Itachi fought back the full-out smile that threatened to take over his lips, instead, he removed the fingers, he smeared a good amount of lubricant onto himself and moved to position himself at his brother's entrance.

And he felt it.

Sasuke was trembling.

_Are you afraid of me, Sasuke?_

"Sasuke?" The younger man didn't turn to look at him.

Itachi almost cried out as he felt himself enveloped in blissful tight heat, his brother was leaning back against him, impaling himself on him. He couldn't stop himself from pushing in all the way, his hands pulling his brother's hips toward him, losing all control of whatever control he had left.

_Just how long have you wanted this?_

_You sick, sick bastard._

Sasuke was just like he remembered.

"Ani...ki..."

_Oh gods, Sasuke. _

_Anything, anything for you._

* * *

_You can't run from me anymore._

Sasuke opened his eyes, taking a second to remember his bearings, he felt like closing his eyes and never waking again.

He betrayed him.

He betrayed him.

He betrayed Naruto.

He felt like killing himself, but was roused from his thoughts when an elegant hand stroked his hair. He instantly relaxed, he didn't know why – he couldn't explain it. He leaned into the touch, silently cursing himself for being so easily manipulated; he let out a sigh as warm lips touched his own.

_Was this all it was about?_

_The sex?_

Sasuke pulled away, moving to get off the bed of which he had no memory of being on, when Itachi stopped him.

"Don't."

Sasuke just looked at him.

"Don't." Itachi hated repeating himself, but he wanted Sasuke to understand.

"You destroyed all that with your own two hands the day you killed our family, 'Aniki'." The last three syllables were pronounced with such accuracy that Itachi's heart bled.

_You're here because I'm here._

Sasuke shook his head violently, as if to clear his thoughts.

"You're regretting this, and you want to go back."

Itachi's hands trailed up his arm to his shoulder, gently pulling him back onto the bed.

"You're _guilty_?"

Itachi sounded almost amused.

His older brother's cool fingers kneaded the back of his neck, almost lovingly.

"Why now, Sasuke? When I clearly gave you the choice?"

Sasuke didn't answer, his muscles tensing all at once. His eyes fixed in the floor in front of the bed.

"You chose _me_, Sasuke. You chose _insanity_."

Hot lips pressed themselves against his temple.

"You can't live without me."

Sasuke didn't respond immediately.

"...I can't live without him either then."

Itachi raised an elegant eye brow.

"What?"

Sasuke's eyes met Itachi's, with slight doubt still evident in their dark depths.

Itachi laughed.

"You're _selfish_, as usual."

Itachi pulled away from the younger Uchiha completely, his feet thudding against the wooden floor as he made his way to what Sasuke figured to be the bathroom. He paused before opening the door.

"...You haven't changed in the least, have you?"

Sasuke stared after his brother's well toned figure, a small blush creeping up his cheeks.

"_Grow up_, Sasuke. Not everything goes your way in life. This is one of those things."

The door was closed a little too hard, startling the younger Uchiha a little.

Sasuke looked down, silently cursing himself.

How did it come to this? Why was he even in this place? Why the hell did he follow his older brother?

"_You _chose_ me."_

Sasuke almost suffocated himself with a pillow.

* * *

**A/N: Promised lemon!! X) I hope it's okay. It's been quite a while since I've written things like this... -- Forgive me if it's not as good as what you might have expected. : ( I really couldn't decide on who should get Sasuke, so I'm thinking of making it ItaNaruSasu...? : ( Don't hurt me. I'm just screwed up like that. Please Review! Your comments keep me alive!! Dx**


	7. Chapter 7

Title : Nostalgia.  
Rating : NC 17  
Summary: "This is the line that marks insanity, Sasuke."

He made a line in the dirt in front of him with his foot.

"Cross it."

Pairing : ItaSasu, NaruSasu, and slight GaaSasu.

--

Naruto was just staring into space, a small thoughtful, _sad_ look on his handsome face.  
It'd been two days.  
Two whole days since Sasuke _walked away_ from him.

He said he'd never let him leave again.  
But he did.

It hurt, it hurt so badly that he could hardly breathe at first, and now it was just a numb, throbbing feeling in his heart.

Just numb.

The brunette that sat beside him sighed.  
"Naruto,"  
The blonde took a minute to respond to his ex-teacher's address, but looked up and tried to smile.  
"Iruka-sensei."  
Naruto popped another fishcake in his mouth.

_Numb._

Iruka frowned, wanted to pat the blonde on the back yet afraid he would crumble if he did. The boy that was so determined on achieving the dream of 'Hokage' seemed so frail now.  
It frightened him, the way Naruto seemed to be breaking inside with every forced smile.  
The Chuunin looked away.

"I think…"

Naruto stopped slurping for a while, looking expectantly at the brunette.  
"I think Sasuke'll come back."  
Naruto nearly dropped his chopsticks, but caught himself.  
"…What do you mean? Sasuke's happy now."

_He can't possibly come back.  
__He _chose_ Itachi.  
…__not _Naruto_._

The numb was starting to scare him.  
Iruka was talking again.  
"The Sasuke I saw with you was the happiest I've ever seen since he came back, Naruto. Surely you've noticed?"  
Iruka ate another mouthful, before setting his chopsticks down.  
Naruto tried to ignore the stab in his chest.

_If he was, he wouldn't have _walked away_, Iruka-sensei._

Naruto chuckled darkly at the thought, his gaze fixed on the cooling Ramen before him.

_If he loved me, he wouldn't have thrown me away again._

He fought the urge to just destroy everything that was in range.  
Iruka was about to say something, when Naruto cut him short.  
"Can we not talk about this, sensei?"  
The blonde's tone allowed little argument, clipped and possessing a sense of authority.  
Iruka didn't say anything after that, but watched silently as Naruto finished his third bowl of Ramen.  
The blonde brushed some invisible lint off his shoulder as he stood up, the black top clinging to his build nicely, announcing to his former teacher that he was "done for the day", he waved and left.

Iruka decided he needed to talk to Kakashi about this.

--

"Where are you going?"  
A hand closed around a slender wrist.  
"…I need to find him."  
Itachi didn't respond immediately, but instead pulled his brother against him.  
"…You don't, and you're not leaving."  
Itachi tightened his hold on his younger brother's wrist, a small frown playing on fine features.  
"I need to-"  
"What _do_ you need to do, _Otouto_?"  
The older Uchiha released the wrist he was holding onto a little angrily, a small sneer now present on his finely chiseled face.  
Sasuke froze as he was pushed against the door, the metal of the door knob digging into his abdomen painfully. Itachi's hot breath ghosted by the shell of his ear.

"You know I'll lock you up if I have to, Sasuke."

The touch was scalding, yet strangely arousing.  
The words seemed to roll of Itachi's tongue, a delicious, mocking note.  
"You're mine."

Sasuke closed his eyes, suddenly losing all will to fight.

_Itachi was a drug.  
A drug he never really gave up on._

The darkness behind his eye lids were comforting, the door knob digging into his side kept him rooted to the present, as well as the warmth that was currently pressed against his body.

Itachi's scent.  
It was nostalgic.

He couldn't help but bury his head further into his brother's bare shoulder.

_Even if he was the one who took everything away from you.  
Then again, you never needed anything but him in the first place._

"I love you, Sasuke."

His throat was dry.

--

"I love you, Sasuke."

Naruto stared out the window; half hoping that he would feel that familiar chakra signature, find that familiar silhouette against it.  
He was only greeted with a cool breeze and the sounds of a stray cat knocking over the nearby trashcans.

_He wanted to break so badly._

A thousand questions surged through his mind.

_Do I find him? Do I leave him?_

He closed his eyes, wanting to disappear.

_I love him. I love him. I want him back. _

He lay back against the faded orange sheets of his bed.  
He didn't want to hand him over.  
Itachi didn't deserve him.

_After all that he's done to him._

Sasuke wasn't thinking straight.  
Sasuke couldn't have been.  
He didn't want to think that he was.

_Sasuke belonged to him._

_He said so himself._

"_Mine."_

He opened his eyes slowly, a small determined look on his tanned features.  
He would take back what was his.  
The ebony haired boy would be by his side again.

--

_I don't want to leave.  
I need to leave.  
I want to leave.  
I can't leave._

_He wanted to break so badly._

Sasuke hated himself.  
He couldn't decide.  
And he hated himself.

It was so unbearably selfish.

He was so sorry.  
He was really, really sorry.

It always seemed to be his fault.

_Everything was your fault.  
You just weren't good enough._

"Sasuke."  
He looked up to the older Uchiha, a small blank look.  
"What are you thinking?"  
He didn't reply immediately, silently regarding his older brother's features, as if he were trying to memorize them all over again.  
Sasuke reached out to touch Itachi's arm, gently.

"I'm not good enough."  
Itachi's features hardened at that, but he didn't reply.  
"I can't…"  
Sasuke looked down at the floor now, letting his hand slide down his older brother's arm.  
"It's my fault."  
Itachi's muscles seemed to ripple with a hidden anger.

"I'm sorry."

_Don't apologize.  
Don't you dare._

"It's not your fault."

_It never was, and never will be._

Itachi pressed a kiss to the younger Uchiha's forehead.

"Don't insult me, Sasuke."

Sasuke would have laughed if the tears weren't blurring his vision.  
Itachi's embrace was too tight and comforting.

_Please, please stop loving me._

He couldn't speak.

_He wanted to say that to Naruto._

"Please, stop loving me."

_That's enough._

Itachi growled, pinning his younger brother's arms above his head, bringing their faces close together.  
"Say that again and I'll _kill_ you."

Sasuke's breath quickened, half wanting to risk that threat becoming a reality and half wanting to return to the comfort Itachi had offered.  
"I-"  
He was cut off by an almost vicious kiss, Itachi's teeth sank into his bottom lip, almost drawing blood, forcing a groan from the younger Uchiha's throat.

_You don't know.  
…__You have no idea how much I went through for you._

Itachi slid his free hand under his brother's shirt.

_No one will call us "sin" anymore._

The younger Uchiha cried out, keeping his eyes trained on the floor. His brother's calloused hands roaming over the sensitive flesh of his abdomen.

"A-Aniki…"

Itachi's nearly tore the shirt off his sibling, in a fit of both anger and lust; he sucked on the tender skin under the Sasuke's ear, ignoring the feeble pleas that fell upon his ears.

_You can't tell me to stop loving you.  
Not after all I've done for you, Sasuke._

He bit into the pale shoulder, ignoring the pang of guilt in the depths of his consciousness, his free hand struggling with his brother's pants.

_You're mine._

--

Naruto cursed.

How would he find him?  
He was sure they'd left Konoha by now.

He was jumping from roof to roof, with the speed and accuracy fit of an ANBU captain, searching for any clue at all as to where Sasuke may have gone.

_He was losing it, slowly, surely._

He would find him.  
He would find him and bring him back.

Just like he planned the first time he left.

--

**A/N: I'm so sorry! I've been thinking really hard about this story. I hope you guys are still keen on reading it… I've been really busy too, with exams and all. I finally finished this chapter, and I tried making it a little longer than the usual chapter to atone for the dreadfully long waiting time! Well, I suppose I've come to a conclusion, that the story probably **_**won't**_** be ItaNaruSasu. I can't say exactly what the pairing is now though. Please bear with my incompetence! D: The chapter is a little abstract, I think, cause it jumps from POV to POV. I'm sorry! D:**

**...And it hasn't been BETAd...so any mistakes would be my fault. D:**

**Read and Review please!**

**I'm so sorry!**


	8. Chapter 8

Title : Nostalgia.  
Rating : NC 17  
Summary: "This is the line that marks insanity, Sasuke."

He made a line in the dirt in front of him with his foot.

"Cross it."

Pairing : ItaSasu, NaruSasu, and slight GaaSasu

* * *

Itachi woke to find his younger brother asleep, pressed against his chest, like the child he so desperately fought to protect.

_This is Sasuke_, he reminded himself, fondly brushing stray locks away from the porcelain face that so much resembled his own.

_This was the reason I did what I did._

He exhaled slowly, disentangling himself from the younger Uchiha as carefully as he could, he looked out the window, the country of mist lay sprawled out before him, a small quiet little village, one he had to thank Kisame for.

No one could take Sasuke away here.

No one.

* * *

Naruto had returned to Konoha feeling extremely stupid.

He'd spent a week searching the more secluded places of the country of fire, before realizing that he should have sourced for more information first, flying back to Konoha as fast as his legs could take him.  
He arrived in the early hours of dusk.

"Iruka-sensei!"  
The brunette had yelped when he heard the loud voice of his former student suddenly at his door, but set down the Academy papers he was marking and opened the door.  
"Naruto? Where were you? You've been missing for a week!"  
The blonde man ignored him, pushing past him to enter the house, as if searching for something.  
"Where's Kakashi-sensei?"  
Iruka blushed.  
"What made you know I was here, Naru-chan?" A sing-song voice came from the kitchen, and a very happy Kakashi sauntered into the living room with a warm cup of tea in his hands.  
Then the copy-nin's eye focused and settled on him.  
"You're looking for Sasuke?"

It wasn't a question, it was a statement.

"I need you to help me find him, Kakashi-sensei."  
Blue eyes followed the silver-haired ninja as he made himself comfortable on Iruka's couch.  
"Sure you do, he's with Itachi."  
Naruto's muscles turned to stone at the mention of the older Uchiha, his chakra starting to prickle.  
"Sasuke doesn't know what he's doing."  
Kakashi's eye narrowed.  
"And _you_ do?"  
Naruto didn't reply, settling instead for looking down.  
Kakashi scoffed, a small smile visible through his mask.  
"You're being unreasonably selfish, Naruto."  
Blue eyes trained on the copy ninja once more, this time slightly startled.  
Kakashi continued, keeping his eye fixed on the blonde.  
"Have you thought about how Sasuke may feel about this? He'd just gotten back, just _finally_ found a reason to stay here, and he's suddenly confronted with the single person who took away everything he had?"  
Naruto barely blinked.  
"...the single person who he respected, admired and maybe even worshipped?"  
Naruto's throat felt dry.  
"Feelings like that don't just disappear, Naruto."  
Iruka shared a look with the silver-haired ninja, before disappearing into the study.  
"He loves Itachi."  
The blonde felt his heart sink.

_It was cracking.  
It hurt as if someone had gutted him alive with the blunt, rusted knife._

His eyes blurred, his ears registering every noise around him in return.

Kakashi's voice sounded like needles.

"But I'm sure he loves you too."

"...What?"  
Kakashi looked away then, sipping his tea.  
"He loves you too, Naruto. Which is why this is a delicate subject."  
Naruto took a shaky step towards the man on the couch, his voice cracking.  
"But that's..."  
_That's just fucking confusing.  
_Naruto fell silent, his hands trembling.  
_Sasuke, Sasuke, Sasuke._  
Kakashi's voice persisted through his mental turmoil.

"I can see it, Naruto."

_Fuck it._

* * *

Sasuke opened his eyes abruptly, his hand reaching for something that he could no longer see.

_Tanned hands against his skin, warm, warm and delicious touches._

He lowered his hand; bringing it to his temples instead, a small frown gracing his beautiful features.

_Warm lips pressed against his collar bone, everything seemed tinged with gold as he was engulfed in sheer warmth. _

"Naruto..." The whisper had barely left his lips when he heard the door open, and was greeted with the sight of his brother pulling on a tank top before brushing off any lint on his pants.  
He silenced himself as Itachi came closer, looming over him, cool fingers pressing against his forehead.

"Good morning, little brother."  
Itachi was letting his chakra touch him, and it was dizzying. Sasuke let out a small sigh as he pushed the hand away, frowning when his brother let out a low rumble of laughter.

_This is the Sasuke I fought so hard to keep._

He leaned forward to nuzzle the younger man's cheek, before planting a slow, languid kiss on pliant lips.

_This is the Sasuke that's mine._

The kiss had somehow morphed into a battle of tongues, and Itachi growled, grabbing Sasuke's hand and lacing their fingers together, they broke away only for air.

_Mine and no one else's._

Itachi finally pulled away from the younger Uchiha completely, slowly gathering their belongings and throwing them into one of the cloth bags he had found quite carelessly.  
Sasuke sat up, frowning a little, his dark eyes focusing on his brother, a small breath escaping his lips.

"Where are you going?"

Itachi paused, returning the stoic gaze his younger brother cast him, a small look of apology on his face that went as quickly as it came.

"I have a mission, Sasuke. I won't be long." The older Uchiha continued in his intentions.  
"I'm coming with you."  
Itachi paused again, giving the boy a cold look.  
"You're staying here."  
_Where I can keep you safe._

Sasuke cursed softly.  
"I don't want to be left alone here!"

_For all I fucking know you could be leaving me again for good._

Itachi didn't miss the little glint of fear in the boy's eyes.

"I'm not a child anymore, Itachi."  
The older Uchiha dropped the item at hand, moving over to the side of the bed, sat down.  
"I know."  
Itachi reached over to stroke the younger boy's nape, before pulling him into an embrace, an awkward yet strangely welcome action.  
_Let me make it up to you.  
Let me love you.  
_  
"You can come with me."

Sasuke was slightly surprised that his brother had given in so easily, but nodded, deciding to stay in that position for a little while longer.

* * *

Naruto had heard that the Akatsuki had been spotted near the area, and had just dropped by in the slightest chance that he might see Sasuke. He had already been let down twice before – where there was Akatsuki activity, but there was no Itachi, which meant no Sasuke.

He navigated his way through crowded streets, blue eyes bright and searching for that familiar silhouette, that familiar back. He had been roaming for hours, and was heading back to his inn room when he saw him.

Sasuke.

…dressed in a cloak, looking as fresh and beautiful as the day he had left him.

Naruto's heart sank.

A million questions raced through his mind.

_What if he doesn't want me?  
What if he won't come back?  
What if he throws me away again?  
What if he never loved me in the first place?_

Doubts clouded his mind, his vision.

"_He loves you too."  
_Kakashi's words echoed at the back of his mind.  
He made no sound, but continued to follow the cloaked figure. Itachi was nowhere in sight.  
He wanted to call out to him, to embrace him, but he couldn't find his voice.

_Sasuke!_

Almost as if the ebony-haired boy heard him, he turned.

Their eyes met.

He could almost hear the fairer boy's voice as he mouthed his name.  
_"Naruto…"  
_A single inexplicable tear slid down a fair cheek.

* * *

**A/N: I'm so sorry!! *cowers* I should have put this up a long time ago, but I just couldn't find the time! Cliffhanger for this chapter! I hope there are still people following this. :x Once again, unBETAed, so any mistakes are my own. Many apologies. D:  
**


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